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Nov 22, 2017
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Jun 24, 2010
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Bad Luck!
by: Pat

Life sure slings its arrows sometimes and this is one of those times. The man was probably no one who will hurt you; probably just happened to be there, though I understand why his very presence made you nervous, what with your private info being announced to the world!

Sometimes shelters or the NCADV (National Coalition Against Domestic Violence) can help you re-locate majorly, or at least tell you how to get this kind of help. The police might have resources also. The shelter where I volunteer gets about 2 women and their kids a month from a distant location who were re-located by some DV organization--from as far away as Puerto Rico and northern NY State.

Good luck to you.
SHELTER KIDS http:/bit.ly/ruralwriter

Jun 24, 2010
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Hang In There!
by: Jennasy

Good Morning! :)

I am so sorry that you have ran into a major roadblock throughout this very important journey, Jane. :(

Breach of confidentiality is a very serious thing when it comes to advocates because we as you do understand the significance of what can happen as a result of it.

I understand that you do not want to mention to the advocates their client who violated this trust whether by accident or otherwise, but now you have to really consider whether remaining in that area is the best for you now.

I am glad to know that you have safety planned around your car. What's also important is safety planning around you. Is there a safety plan in place for you, too?

This is a very valid reason why I personally do not like bringing people into shelters in their hometown locations (assuming the other client is in her hometwon) because it is to easy to accidentally identify the shelter program, or residents in that program. I will bring them in only after I have exhausted all other opportunities. When they do come in....I safety plan, safety plan, safety plan!

Victim's can minimize the abuse because they think they are responsible for it. Sending her out in her hometown in my opinion, put's a target on her back for her abuser to locate her.

I understand that your limited stay is a very short one, and we should really consider utilizing this breach of confidentiality as a tool to move you. I do not know how you feel about that, but if it is because of your housing opportunities that you do not want to move then maybe something can be worked out with advocates to remain on their list, so moving wouldn't have to change your name on the list.

I also know you have had to move several times, so I get it that you are exhausted with moving.

If you do not want to leave, then in being your own best advocate it is crucial in times like this that you put yourself first.

Your a very trusting free spirit, Jane. You know the level of security you need, and it just takes one person's comment to a complete stranger to raise that level of security, and have it backfire on you.

I am in the office today through Saturday, feel free to give me a call if you want to, and we can talk more about this, and brainstorm ideas on helping you to feel safer, and to be safer.

**Hugs**
Jennasy

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